FAQ's
And the answers I give
and then the answers I want to give.


Ex-pats, the moment a Chinese person discovers you speak Mandarin, ALWAYS ask the same questions. At first I welcomed the interest and pure curiosity, but after while, I've become annoyed with the same old song and dance. Can't people come up with interested questions?

So here they are; frequently asked questions (Q), along with the answers I give (A), and the answers I would love to give (T) but don't.

Q: You speak Chinese?
A: yes
T: No, I don't speak Chinese; I just communicated through my telepathic powers.

Q: How long have you been in China?
A: 10 months
T: Too long

Q: Wow, 10 months!? How did your Chinese get so good?
A: I studied at University.
T: I'm brilliant, obviously.


Q: Do you like China?
A: yes, it has its good points
T: Yes, it has its good points, but its bad points really suck.

Q: What country are you from?
A: America
T: I'm from Shenzhen-can't you tell I'm Chinese?

Q: Do you like Chinese food?
A: Yes
T: No, the MSG gets me sick all the time.

Q: Do you have a boyfriend?
A: Yes,
T: It’s none of your business.

Q: Is your boyfriend Chinese?
A: No, he's American
T: Again, its none of your business.

Q: Don't you like Chinese boys? You should date a Chinese guy too, your boyfriend will never know.
A: I like my boyfriend-one is enough.
T: um, cheating on my boyfriend is not something I would ever do, so stop asking me stupid questions about my personal life.

Q: How much money do you make?
A: I don't understand your question. (Feigning language barrier)
T: A lot for China, it’s none of your business.

Q: When do return to the states?
A: 2 months.
T: not soon enough.